Holistic Wellbeing - Finding my Voice!
Setting the Scene
I took our dogs for a walk the other day. They are brilliant at home together, they cuddle up and share their toys although they have very different personalities. Molly, the black, white and tan dog is the eldest. She is mostly calm and a little scared of the world. Minnie, the ginger ninja, is a former street dog and she was never scared of anything, until she met Molly.
When I take them for a walk, I have to take them separately. Whereas Minnie is now more anxious than she used to be due to Molly’s influence, Molly is now a lot louder than she used to be. On a walk, Minnie will have a bark but sets Molly off and then Molly just keeps barking although she has no idea what she’s barking at!
Looking a Little Deeper
The reason I’m telling you this, is that during my second walk (with Molly who is great on her own!), I started thinking about the people who have influenced me throughout my life. I realised, that after years of prioritising others, I am finally starting to put myself first again.
I have known for a long time that this day would come (I've been waiting two decades!) but with raising a family, looking after people, working and so on, I felt I had lost my authentic voice. The voice where I could look at a blank page and feel like I wanted to write; the creative voice that would speak to me when my head was clear. This is no-one's fault but looking back, I have still worked tirelessly to keep my dream alive hoping there would be a point where it all came together.
When I was younger, I always knew I would end up in Austria. My inner voice and intuition guided me so strongly that I felt this destiny was almost inevitable. When I ended up falling in love over there and living in a very creative environment, I was in no doubt that this was my destiny and I had been blessed with this life where I felt fully at home. Unfortunately, all of that came to a very tragic and abrupt end, the height of which was when my fiance died suddenly.
Over the last couple of decades, life has taken over. The inner voice that guided me seems to have faded into the background and I was worried I wasn't going to find "her" again. On the walk, I realised that I had found my way back onto my path after all of this time. I was picking up my creatively emotional journey once more.
Over the years, I have sometimes struggled to cope with everything. I have felt overwhelm and at times, there have been triggers that have sent me back to quite a dark time. I have always remembered Choose, Connect and Communicate. The 3 C's to take back some control but I am not always good at stage 3 and asking for help for myself.
To help me cope, I have used Creative Emotions. I have created, tried and tested, a range of products for my Etsy shop that all feel indubitably me. These stem from sunflowers, spirals to crochet and poetry.
My career has been focussed on project and business management and when I look back, people along the way have helped guide me into becoming a qualified coach. A role, for the first time, where I feel authentically myself. I have also kept in touch with my holistic side; I became a Reiki Master and I now volunteer on a working group for the Reiki Federation too.
Putting it into Practice
On my walk, I realised that although I have felt that I was constantly juggling so many aspects of life, I now have the clarity to link up all of my skills and experience for this next chapter. This has given me the confidence to share my voice again and more importantly, I am feeling whole again.
A Moment for Reflection
I am definitely going to take more walks to ensure I connect with nature, stay more in tune with myself and have precious time out! The dog walk made me realise that although so many people have guided and steered me in the same direction, it is my own inner voice that has been the most influential. It has been there all along, I just couldn't find it for the noise and chaos of life.
I think culturally, I have also felt like I've had to leave my losses in the past. As Bob Marley once said!, "In this great future, you can't forget your past." This is why, apart from the birth of my children, etc, loss and the influence of those I loved and lost, has played a huge part in my life and I want to help others in similar situations to find their own path and voice again. I want to talk openly about my feelings and ponder on so many ideas I have had swimming around in my mind. I hope you enjoy my "Personal and Poetic Ponderings".
Takeaway Message
It is never too late to reconnect with yourself and to rediscover what you believe in. You will find the confidence to express your true self and never forget that your thoughts, feelings and opinions matter. Your voice deserves to be heard, especially by you! Find something that helps clear your mind, tune in and your voice will come through...
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